Nothing is fair!

Those who advise you to keep working hard and not worry about the reward are nothing but lying! Things in this world at least are not fair. The good things that happen to you are not commensurate with the good things you do. If you start counting the sacrifices that you've made in life for a better return in future, then it'll be manifold of the actual repayment. Then why do people keep saying that the world is a fair place? And why proverbs like 'what you sow, so shall you reap’ are iterated every time? Why can't people accept the way it is? Why do they fool themselves and others by creating such a milieu? Should we not do things because they are to be done, instead of doing things in hope of a future reward?

Yeah nothing is actually fair in this world and neither is it supposed to be. It will be better that we accept the way it is. We all have been given certain tasks to perform keeping in mind our strengths and weaknesses. All we have to do is to make sure that we don't under-perform. If you're not comfortable in what you're doing then probably you're not doing what you were supposed to do.

A perusal of history proves it. How many people, who were not famous, other than your ancestors, can you name? Hardly anyone! Why we are only taught about famous personalities? Is it that only famous personalities did good things? Why do we call Akbar great despite knowing that he had relations with 5000 women [wives and concubines]? Why are we not aware of a single ordinary contemporary of Akbar who practiced monogamy? The answer is because he was never rewarded for this good gesture of showing faith to his only wife! The whole idea is to make sure that whatever you do bears fruit of success because this world is a not fair. It remembers the end rather than the means of achieving the end. Trust me if demon Ravana would have defeated Lord Ram in the epic of Ramayana, we today would have been celebrating win of  love of a brother(Ravana) for his sister(Shrupnakha) rather than celebrating the love of a husband(Ram) for his wife(Sita). And accordingly the epic of Ramayana would have been tweaked to adjust the defeat of demon Lakshmana(because he amputated Shrupnakha's nose) by Lord Ravana. It also would have been rechristened to Ravanayana instead of Ramayana. 

I am not a pessimist and I love to take it as a challenge of leaving my mark in this world by being the best in whatever task I was assigned. Not everyone is born with a silver spoon; some are born with the capability of earning it. If you want to be remembered then make sure whatever you do leads to fruition. It'll be better if you do it in an ethical manner not out of fear of God but because it is ethical to be ethical. I would also suggest to stop lamenting and complaining about your current state as you cannot do anything about it. If you cannot afford to buy a luxury car today then start working for it instead of crying over it which only squanders your chances of buying it even in future.

Yeah some people are born rich or lucky or rich and lucky but that shouldn't make you envious. The only way to outdo their luck is to work harder than them. The good thing about hard work is that it never runs out whereas luck doesn't guarantee that. Also everybody has his own share of luck. We are a lot times awarded credit for things which we didn't work for albeit at that time we don't see our luck working.

The world was never fair and it'll never be. Darwin's theory of 'survival of the fittest' vindicates it. If the world would have been fair, do you think that only the fittest would survive? And for that matter why only a few of them were fitter than others? Proving again that nothing in this world is fair. The fitter ones make sure that others don't butcher their claims on resources and hence eliminate the weaker ones.  

It'll better that we stop fooling ourselves about fairness of this world and start working pragmatically. The world will never care about you if don't prove your mettle and force people to change their opinion about you. Do you know why? Because it would be fair to do so and nothing in this world is fair! 

Social Network and its perilous superficiality

We live in a world where we are disconnected in a very connected manner. We have hundreds of friends on social networks but don't talk to them. We are aware about almost all the activities of our friends but hardly care to find out their feelings. We know the whereabouts of most of them, yet we fail to meet them. What kind of a world is it? So much connected and yet disconnected? Everything seems so real in this fake world of social network. 

How often a birthday notification forces you to wonder about who the hell is this guy and what is he doing in my friend list? How often you are reminded of your good friend's birthday by a notification?  How often less number of likes on your picture makes you think that you're not good looking? How often do you conform to the latest trending issues without judging their veracity? How often you find fifty friends online and yet nobody to talk to? How often you find posts that make sense?

To me social network reeks in anti-sociality. It was because of the advent of nuclear families that the new progeny acquired the trait of adjusting without socializing much with people as there were less at home. But the inherited trait kept alive the desire to socialize. It was against this background that made social network so popular within a few years and the world went crazy. We now have information about our distant friends but are not aware about the health of our neighbours. The new progeny eventually found its way to socialize albeit rejecting the previously existing ways of socializing. We can now talk to world about our views but when it comes to dealing with relatives at home, the situation becomes nightmarish.

I am not completely averse to the idea of connecting through social network and in no way trying to indicate that we should disconnect from this world. I know it has a lot of benefits if used prudently. All I want to convey is that we should know how to keep away from it as well. Not every notification should sensationalize us. The urge of looking at it should be in our control rather than we being in control of that urge. The distinction between personal and pubic life should be lucid. We should know what should be updated online and what should not. It's time to learn to log out of the fake world of the social network and to re-login to actual social world.

Further it is pertinent to point out that we are being tracked all the time. All our activities are being monitored. The more we exercise it, the more it is easy to track us. Even if we are not involved in any wrong doing and we don't mind authorities keeping a tab on us, why should we make their task easy? At the time when hon'ble Supreme Court of India has stated that storing private information i.e. biometric data about the citizens cannot be made mandatory and has made AADHAR card voluntary(except in a few schemes) in nature, then why should we ourselves give away all our details like that?

Moving on let's analyse who actually are we connected with? Are they all our friends? No. Are they important in our lives? Not really. According to me, we know only a small proportion of friends, out of such a long friend list. Out of the ones we know, we rarely indulge in a chat with them. Even those chats are boring and not at all productive as productive talks are done with well-informed people. Those who are well-informed, they are really not that active on such networks. So is it worth to be connected to the world while sitting in a closed room?

So instead of lamenting over the network issues should we not ourselves switch it off for some time? Should not the propensity to know about life of others belittled? And should not the penchant of sharing everything with the world be subsided? Should that vacuum be not filled in with better things that help us grow as a society? Should we not be playing outdoors instead of weakening our eyes by playing Candy Crush? 

In the cacophony of the discordant voices of the social network we all are losing our own voices. Anyone who plays the bagpiper well uses his talent to mobilize the netizens to dance to his tune. No doubt politicians have started using this platform for propaganda. Anti-social elements find it easy to spread rumours through this channel. In fact the terrorist organisations have started targeting youths for recruitment. And what is the worst part? We are actually falling prey to them. 

No network can guarantee our privacy. We ourselves are to be blamed for creating such a situation. The way ahead is to be more prudent in our dealings online. We have to stop looking at the world outside through the artificial windows of our computers and actually get out of our homes to breathe in fresh air. Having said that all, the irony is I am also using this social network to make people think about how social is this social network.

A short trip to my village!

The last time I visited, I saw my Dadi ji lying in peace in the cloister, as I entered the house (temple). My 12th boards were going on when the news of her demise came. My parents had just returned to Delhi after paying her a visit only to receive the sad news in the morning- as if my father somehow knew that his mother's end was near and planned all of a sudden to meet her. So the next day we all went there to bid her the last goodbye and participate in her last rites. I still clearly remember her burning funeral pyre with the background being decorated by the Supemoon of 19th March, 2011. As if the date was carefully chosen for her. The Gods descended to take her for a new life.

She was bedridden for years and was waiting for the inevitable! When I saw her the last time there was a sense of calm on her face which was missing for past so many years. She finally left behind sorrows of this world! 

It was different this time. After four long years a plan to visit the ancestral village was again made-though again suddenly. Gandhi ji helped us in this trip as Gandhi Jayanti fell on Friday followed by the weekend. The bags were packed, all necessities were kept and this house was locked to start the journey towards the ancestral house.

Despite being born and raised in the national capital, I still am proud of my roots in Rajasthan. People there are so genuinely loving and caring. You hardly find doors kept closed there in the daytime. When here in Delhi you don't know your neighbours, there everybody knows everyone else. Every household is aware of the problems being faced by the fellow villagers. It’s like a very big family living together in a small area sharing and caring for each other.

I thoroughly enjoyed driving through the five hour long journey from the plains of Delhi to the foothills of Aravali. As soon as we entered the road which deviates from the National Highway towards the village we could see our ancestral land which is now sown by my uncle. The very smell of that village is many times more intoxicating than any other drug- so pure and pollution free. Most of the people still recognized me just by looking once and those who couldn't they made the correct guess after looking at my father.

The village has changed a bit. The roads were better; I saw solar powered streetlights, some new shops and houses with better sanitary facilities. And the best thing I heard was people were being fined if caught defecating outside! So policies of our P.M. are indeed working.

I mentioned 'temple' in the brackets above because the house is a temple cum residence. Dau ji's idol is main idol of the sanctum along with other deities present inside the temple as well as outside it. There are many mystical stories of Dau ji's altruism, recited over and over again by my aunties which I cannot fathom, as they pose serious challenges to scientifically radicalized rational mind. 

It is only when you move away from the highest polluted capital of the world you realize that stars are still there! Those constellations, shooting stars and the bright night sky lit by the light of stars and not by the street lamps is still there! And that view is worth dying for! I can carry on filling up many more pages praising the village life but I don't want to bore my readers. So I'll end with a perplexing coincidence.

Last time I visited on the Supermoon of 2011. This time I visited my village four days after the Supermoon of 2015. 2015 and 2011 also differ by 4. Both the times I stayed there only for one day. Is there a pattern?? Was it just a coincidence?? Or did that happen at the behest of Dau ji?? I know nobody can answer those questions. All I can do is to wait eagerly for the next Supermoon !! 

When I met The Missile Man.

"Stop the car, there it is!"- I shouted. "Are you sure ?", asked others. "I know that is the one", I replied. Even our driver who was a local guy didn't knew about it, but I did!

A trip was planned to South India. Itinerary included Rameshwaram, Madurai, Kanyakumari and Thiruananthampuram. I planned to buy a book to read during the journey and hence bought 'Wings Of Fire'- autobiography of our late President Dr. A.P.J. Abdul Kalam. We started our journey from Delhi. After landing at Trivandrum(now Thiruananthampuram) airport, we halted at a guest house for the night. The journey to Rameshwaram began early morning the next day.

It was only then that I realized that our loving president now rests in peace at a place close to Rameshwaram. So I asked our driver to stop there as well. As I was reading his autobiography the curiosity to meet him, albeit after his death was increasing. His journey from a place like Rameshwaram, his downtrodden condition in childhood, developing SLV-3(Satellite Launch Vehicle) and AGNI missile and many other such feats are truly an inspiration. When we were about to reach his burial place,I realized, even the driver wasn't sure of the exact burial site, as he was enquiring from people around. We crossed the picturesque Pamban Bridge. I knew we were close. I was finally going to meet him. The driver increased the speed to reach fast only to overshoot the distance."Stop the car, there it is!"- I shouted. "Are you sure ?", asked others. "I know that is the one", I replied. (I had seen the broadcast of his funeral on a news channel which was exactly two months prior to my visit.)

And he was there, right in front of my eyes. The man who helped India in becoming a Superpower, the one who gave us indigenous technologies now rests in peace very close to a sea in serenity!

                                                                                 

In the soft sands,

on the coastline,

with the National Flag fluttering,

and the sea breeze blowing,

is now Mr. Kalam resting!

What an honour it is to have the National Flag besides your grave! If only one tenth of our population can become one tenth as good a person and a patriot as he was, what cannot be achieved? He taught us how things can be done even when failures happen and how things are handled at the helm of affairs. Bharat Ratna, Padma Bhushan, Padma Vibhushan, Indira Gandhi Award for National Integration, Hoover Medal, Veer Savarkar Award, Ramanujan Award are only a few accolades that vindicate it. 

I couldn't meet him when he was alive but I think it doesn't matter because he is still not dead. His spirit is alive and we have to make sure that we preserve his ideology. If only that can be done, he will live forever in our hearts! No doubt why he was called 'People's President'. A non-political person rarely reaches to that level but such a personality was our 'Missile Man' and the 'Most Loved President'- Dr. Avul Pakir Jainulabdeen Abdul Kalam!

It was a coincidence that I was reading his autobiography when we met. I hadn't planned it. I think I may be the first person to do that and I don't know why but I take pride in it. Things are not always according to our will but we should make sure that we are quick to adjust. On this note I'll conclude with lines(he didn't write these lines but quoted them) I liked in his autobiography:

God has not promised

Skies always blue,

Flower-strewn pathways

All our life through;

God has not promised

Sun without rain,

Joy without sorrow,

Peace without pain.

I hope I'll not be charged with plagiarism for copying it!

Choosing the launch pad

How many times do we think about our past? How many times we feel that things could have been so much better? How many times we regret our decisions?

To be honest at least once in a fortnight these thoughts do come up! “Had I [not] done that I wouldn't/would have been this/that”- the thought that haunts us. The regrets of life are not easy to handle. They make us weak and at times can turn into depression. Why do we regret? Why we keep pondering over things which we don't have? Why didn't we choose what we actually wanted to do in the first place? 

According to me the answer lies somewhere in peer pressure and conforming to the situation without a rationale behind it. We often take decisions based on the accepted norms of the society rather that following our own desires. So someone who wanted to become a swimmer ends up becoming an engineer and has no explanation as to why he took that decision. The society has a major role to play. We all want to look good in the eyes of society even if that means squandering our dreams! Why is that we all are in a hurry? Why can't we wait more? Why can't we strive to do whatever we want to do? Why can't we choose the correct launch pad that has the ability to catapult in the direction that we want?

If we have been offered only one life then is it not our duty to make most out of it? Trust me a separate launch pad has been specially designed for all of us. All we have to do is to patiently search for it. The positive aspect is that you only have to struggle in finding it. Once it has been found then there is no one who can stop you from reaching the heights you continuously dream about. Once it is under your control then you can achieve your dream by only pushing the button. The irony is that most of us don't even start to look for it. Some of us give up our search when encountered upon with some minor impediments. If your dreams are big, your struggle and sacrifices have to be bigger!

Most of us want to have the launch pad of somebody else, not realizing the differences between us and that person and end up crashing in the ocean. Still many of us who do try look for the correct one end up choosing the wrong one. These ones don't crash but they take you to Mars against your intention of going to Jupiter. In either case you don't fully exercise your potential and don't succeed!

What should be done in such a case? Well I am not an adept in this subject. I am also still looking for my own launch pad. What I know is that there is no one stopping in starting your search all over again even if you've failed quite a few times. No matter how many launch pads you destroy but don't hesitate in trying the new ones till you are placed in the apt orbit of your life. There is no point in doing what the world is doing because simply the world is already doing it, so do something what the world is not doing.

"Either achieve it or die in the process of achieving it but don't give up your dream."

Uncertainties in life!

The most amazing part of one's life is that one never knows what next life will throw at you. You decide to do one thing and then some things are decided by some other force. The tragedy is, most often the wish of that force succumbs your own wish. Another thing that one can never figure out is how many forces are in cahoots with each other to make sure that your own wish doesn't prevail. Are there many such forces? Is it one?

Theists out of no other choice, term it 'the will of God'. Is it really God? If yes, then why would he rule against my wish? Wouldn't it be nice of him to decide in my favour? At this juncture, an Optimist due to his virtue says 'Whatever happens happens for good'. Dear Optimist what if I deliberately wanted it to be bad? So the worse would it have been, the better would it have been. I generally stop here because now the rest of the world starts calling me a crank head. 

Is uncertainty a vital aspect of life? Let's analyse.

What would be the world like when we knew about everything that is going to happen next? At 3:58 pm there will be an earthquake, save yourself! At 6:06 am a bird will pee on you during your morning walk. On 23rd March, 2038 you'll be blessed with a daughter and you'll name her 'Selfiequeen'! If this were to happen, will the life remain amazing anymore?

Having said that, yes there are times when this uncertainty/the will of God really turns things upside down. You realize that hitherto you had everything till suddenly life took a turn for worse. You start criticizing everybody around. Nothing seems to come your way. The world suddenly gets shattered and there is no ray of hope. At this point I would say the approach of a Realist can do wonders. The first step is to make peace with the current situation. And then look for a window or a keyhole or an orifice which can at least help you in recognizing the direction of light. Then the hardest step is to actually traverse that path that leads towards light, trusting yourself. This is actually better than sitting in the dark and waiting for something to happen. Why would anything happen? Why would that force show mercy on you belying its own purpose of exasperating you? So isn't it better to accept the reality and just move on with the lesson of uncertainty learnt?

And there is a positive side of it too. Not always your will is actually as beneficial to you as the will of uncertainty. And not always does the will of uncertainty makes your life hell. Sometimes unexpected pleasant surprises are rendered to you for free. The only difference in our approach here is that we don't criticize them. We readily accept them as a result of our good deeds of past. After all we are greedy and selfish humans. 

The moral of the story is that we shouldn't be careless about things that are in our control and always expect the unexpected because things that are out of our control will keep playing their role. Sometimes surprising us and at times exasperating us!

The life is not only about achieving telos but it is rather a continuum right from choosing the ways and means to achieve telos to ultimately achieving it. So don't waste a single second in disappointment!

Striking out the right balance

"In India one lives simultaneously in the twelfth and the twenty first  century - as well as in all centuries in between."      -U. R. Ananthamurthy

The above line aptly explains the state of our nation.The oldest continuously inhabited civilization now is in a dilemma. It is facing difficulty in choosing whether to forgo the age old traditions which have made this country possible or to still stick with them. On one hand we have mastered the art of sending satellites into outer space, on the other we still fight in the name of religion and caste. On one hand we touch the feet of our elders to have their blessings , on the other we have now started asking them to take refuge at old age homes. We now have stopped going to Tantriks for medical treatment but our tubectomy camps are killing our women.Now we know how to protect ourselves from cyclones like 'Hudhud' but we still don't have strategy against communal genocide of 'Muzzafarnagar'. 

The first testament of mankind i.e. The Rig Veda, the first systematic procedure for giving a melody to a chanted verse i.e. The Sam Veda, the first civilization, Yoga, the Karma, the Dharma, four major religions of the world, the invention of 'zero', the romance of bollywood, the allure of Kamasutra and what not? We have pioneered a lot of things. It was against this backdrop that Mark Twain once said " India is the cradle of human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, grandmother of the legend and the grandmother of tradition. Our most valuable and most instructive materials in the history of man are treasured up in India only". 

So should the population of 121 crore forget its age old traditions and start doing whatever the West is doing? No. Rather this calls for bringing out the right balance in our approach. We should not hesitate in carefully adopting from the West only on the condition that we'll indigenize it according to our needs. Simply giving up the idea of drinking 'lassi' for highly caffeinated cold drink will only cause harm in the long run. The time is ripe to shift gear. From the role of a follower we have to switch over to our earlier role of a trend-setter. The 17.5 percent population of the world should compel the world to follow whatever it does instead of following the West blindly!

We stand at crossroads where one path leads to development at the expense of our values and the other leads to preservation of our values at the expense of development. None can be taken without thorough contemplation. The Indian setting is such that we'll have to adopt a middle path. A path where we don't squander the values, a path where we aren't left too much behind in the race of development. This will be a challenge as we don't have many precedents to follow where development and value preservation have gone hand in hand. 


To choose between the comfort of 'kurta-pyjama' or superficial style of jeans, the taste of coconut water or the carbonated cold-drinks, donating to the poor or to temples in the name of God, promoting industries or traditional handicrafts, Sanskritization or Westernization,  Maa or Mummy  is getting difficult by the day!

Evolution has always taken its own course and will keep doing so. I just don't want Indians to lose their actual identities in the process. Therefore striking out the right balance is very important!